On Monday, I mentioned an article by the irrelevant Kevin McCullough entitled "The 'Sex-Box' Race For President," a poorly titled, poorly sourced, and generally just poor piece of journalism. As the game has now been available for months without attracting his attention, I can only assume that his flailing response was based on this other report, itself already far removed from Mass Effect, the game which is ostensibly being described.

Gabe had to watch the other Gabe today, so we made the comic a day in advance.  It's about the guy who wrote that ridiculous Mass Effect article.  We decided to put it up a day early because, just as we predicted in the strip, he's taken a swipe at gamers.  The young man quoted in his piece did not represent our community well, but locking horns with a professional liar would bring out the worst in anyone. 

(CW)TB
 

I don't know if I would attend CES again. If any of you have wondered, as I did last year, whether or not you should go, ask yourself this:

This podcast covers the writing process for today's comic (and a number of other tangents).  Of course, it's entirely possible you had already subscribed to the feed and are currently listening to it.  In which case, I apologize profusely.   

(CW)TB
 

We should have a podcast for you later today that goes into the process behind this strip, but the inspiration is probably well known: the tawdry rutting of franchises that leads to medieval swordspersons fighting teenaged elves and starborne Jedi masters.

It wasn't until the strip was completed that I realized we had written two comic strips at the same time. Gabriel thought this comic was literal, and I thought it was about miscommunication.  At least, I hoped it was.  This is a fantasy to which I still cling.

We have two new shirts up in the store today. The first is our Rock Band design. Tycho says it is a shirt that symbolizes "the indomitable spirit which flows when people act as conduits for rock music." I think it looks pretty cool too. This one is also available in Baby Doll for the ladies.

An actual conversation, transcribed with precision, and then converted into comic form.  It's a comic that required a tremendous amount of research, but we take our responsibility to you very seriously.  Indeed, the strength of this dedication gets us in trouble sometimes.

Some of you have probably already heard it, since I put it up yesterday - but we're trying new hosting for the podcast, and I wanted to make sure everything made sense before I dropped it on the front page.  The podcast is for Wednesday's strip, "The Ungift, Part Two."  You can download it here, or subscribe to the feed here.  The levels are a little crazy in a couple spots, for which I apologize.  I think we've got those ironed out, now. 

(CW)TB

The Penny Arcade Battle Academy Will be meeting next Tuesday the 8th at the Comic Stop. We're an official Pokemon TCG league now. Those of you in the Academy who haven't done so already, should register with Go Pokemon.com. Once you have a POP ID you can post it in this thread and Joe will get you added to the roster. As always, new players are welcome. Just grab a starter deck and be at the Comic Stop around 6.PM. There will be plenty of people willing to walk you through the game if it's your first time. For our regulars, if you're looking for a place up north to get cards and boosters I highly recommend the Cardhaus in Lynnwood. He's got some singles in stock but he also has the best price on boosters I've been able to find. Also, Kiko and I picked up some great tips and a few interesting rules that we did not know about while at the tournament. We'll share our "key learnings" with you all on Tuesday. It should be a fun night, hope to see some new faces.

-Gabe out

Orcs and Elves for the DS has a fairly strong mobile heritage, which is to say that some of its presentation is a little two-frame and raw. If you crave gold and adventure - a common affliction among our people - I think you'll slip past it, and into the retro dungeon crawler at its heart. It's been reviewed much better on the mobiles than it has been on the portable, but I imagine that people who review games that you play on a phone have a more forgiving palette.

I've gone through all the Dickerdoodle pictures I received and I've got some good ones to share. It was too hard to pick just one winner so I ended up picking a top three and they will all get a brand new Nintendo DS.

First let's start with the runners up though.


This mans fervor is impressive.




I know I didn't ask for vagaina cookies but come on, that's awesome.




The "Barbra Walters" filter on this one makes it look so classy.




Is cookie porn a real thing?




He just seems so Innocent. Like maybe this is his first dickerdoodle.



See! Size really doesn't matter.



Sadly he choked to death shortly after this picture was taken.



She's ambitious and I respect that.



I'm pretty sure this was actually their Christmas card.




Alright now on to the winners. Remember each of these chefs will receive their very own Nintendo DS.

-3rd Place -

These guys win for sheer size. That's just a lot of Dickerdoodle.



-2nd Place-

This one is just awesome. The presentation alone is great but then you start seeing little details like the penis reference photos.



-1st Place-

I fucking love this photo. We can tell by her shirt that her dad has forced into helping make these cookies. We can also tell that she is not amused. His expression is actually unreadable. Is he confused? Is he angry? I have no idea what he's thinking but it's priceless. I also love that with some extra dough he made the Quake symbol. So rad.



Thanks to everyone who entered. I hope you all enjoyed your Dickerdoodles. Winners, I'll be getting in touch with you so I can get your info for the prizes.

-Gabe out

The enforced revelry period has finally come to a close. Thank Christ.

I had planned on making a couple posts last week but I ended up getting some kind of devil virus. It was the sort of sick where you don't really sleep. You  just curl up in the bathroom and hallucinate that wolves are encircling you. I'm feeling better now though.

I had wanted to talk about some stuff but I forgot almost all of it during my spirit quest. Let me see if I can remember anything. Sorry if this is sort of scattershot.

I did go to the Pokemon Tournament and I ended up taking fourth. It was my first tourney and I was using a pretty crazy deck I'd built just a few days prior. Kiko also went and he took fifth even though we had the same win loss record during the day. They used some special Pokemon math to push me in to the final four and give him fifth. I pretty proud of both of us. It was a new level of competition that we'd never seen before and I think we played really well.

If you're a fan of Transformers I highly recommend the new animated series on Cartoon Network. Some people might be turned off by the look but I think it's incredible. It's got a very Teen Titans look which makes sense seeing as it's by the same people. Even in vehicle mode these transformers are expressive and full of character.

I read Amulet over the weekend (don't believe the date on his site, it is already in stores) and if you are a fan of comics I suggest you do the same. I don't want to say too much about it. I think that Kazu is one of the most talented individuals working in comics today. With Amulet he has created something timeless.

I've collected all your Dickerdoodle pictures and there's some pretty great stuff in there. Give me some time to sort through them and I'll start posting my favorites soon. I'll get Tycho to help me pick a winner and we'll find something cool here in the office as a prize.


-Gabe out

I was in a guild with the guy who started FigurePrints, and when he extended coupons to the old crew I snapped them up and gave them as Christmas presents. None of my characters ever reached the highest echelons of Azerothian Fashion, so it seemed like they were better invested in Gabriel and Keek, who poured night after night into Battlegrounds and Active Volcanoes fighting dragons and whatnot.  The coupons I have described are difficult to secure, only available in random drawings at random intervals, or if by some twist of fate you happen to have been guildmates with a cunning entrepreneur. It's really a way to ennoble the lost years you plowed into that game. It's the sort of thing you'd think a person would appreciate.

Gabriel had Kara call me to say he wouldn't be in the office to do the strip, a tactic that showed wisdom on his part, because if he'd talked to me himself I would have told him to put his big girl pants on. We'd written the strip already, so we were halfway there.  It was far, far, far outside his comfort level, but I asked Kiko to execute the strip visually.  He excelled - but, then again, he is Kiko.