I don't mean to turn PA into an episode of Kids say the darnedest things but some of you might appreciate this. I was playing Star Wars with my son the other night when he said something funny. Little Gabe is obsessed with Star Wars and so much of our play time involves reenacting the movies. On this particular occasion he was playing the role of the emperor while I was Luke Skywalker. He had seated himself in my computer chair and when he spun around to face me I saw that he had placed a toy Lightsaber on the arm rest. He patted it gently and said "You want this don't you?" I could not help but laugh at how ridiculous the scene was. This bothered him and he told me not to laugh at him because he was the emperor and he was evil. "Yes I know." I told him and tried to get my act together but his little angry eyes underneath the hood of his Mickey Mouse sweatshirt made me laugh even more. "I'm bad." he said and as if to prove it told me "I litter!"

An old friend.

This is something that was brought to me as a legitimate avenue of concern.

The thrilling conclusion to the Ping pong match against Bungie is now up on PATV.

Gabe and I are beginning our descent into Rapture more or less simultaneously, so there's plenty to discuss. I'm still feeling my way around, seeking out the game's throughline. Gabriel loves it whenever there isn't shooting, and there is really quite a lot of shooting, which complicates things. What we both agree on is that Bioshock - and Rapture itself - are much, much broader subjects than the "gonzo shooters" which have thus far defined its chronology.

Ever since Gabriel posted the destinations for our book tour, there has been a steady stream of aggression amassing in his inbox regarding perceived slights towards specific cities or even broad regions.  We don't harbor animosity of any kind for particular geographies, we are not thus constructed; these decisions have everything to do with the limitations of your physical universe and your unrelenting temporal schema.  For me, every new place is a broad matrix of unmet people and unhad snacks, two quantities for which I have an endless enthusiasm. I won't presume to speak for Gabriel, who is more reticent than I when it comes these things, but for my part there is almost nowhere I don't want to go.

I forgot to mention it on Friday, but the latest episode of PATV went up. This is the first of two parts detailing our incredible ping-pong victory over Bungie.

Our new book, The Splendid Magic of Penny Arcade: The 11½ Anniversary Edition AKA "Nearly Twelve Years of Bullshit" will be coming out on February 23rd. This is a huge hardcover book full of great stuff including a history of the comic, Stories about PAX and Child's Play, Interviews, photos, an Art Gallery, A selection of our favorite comics from the past 11 years, and some of our best story-lines. I'm really proud of this book and in order to celebrate its release, Tycho and I will be kicking off a cross country book tour. Here is the full list of where we'll be and when we'll be there.

Mass Effect 2 is finally in the bag after perhaps thirty hours of interstellar ramblin', and I'll be God Damned if they haven't ended up with something like a new genre. Bioware's unsparing assessment of their first go-round has resulted in a taut-ass sky-journey that spends hour after hour cinching itself around your throat.

is so fucking rad. 

Virtually every person who's "done time" in Azeroth has begged for a portable Auction House application, a hunger which is being answered with a premium application - and may it be the first of many. I'm not a current player, though Gabriel made an honest entreaty yesterday morning to that effect. Even so, I'm intrigued by the idea of secondary screens as vectors of gameplay. Make no mistake: the Auction House is absolutely a game. For my part, I hope they don't implement this and then recline in satisfaction; harvesting and crafting in particular are open to a systemically valid manifestation.

You may have guessed that we'd feel it necessary to comment on the most recent local news offering about videogames. I'm of the opinion that we've already illuminated their general practices with this ancient comic, created almost two years ago to the day. If there's a better way to characterize the essential mendacity and debauched ethics of that format, I know it not.

Something I like about Mass Effect 2 (and this is a list which must be appended frequently) is that I have a personal assistant. In a continuing effort to physically twist off any game element that does not support their lean new thesis, there is a character in the game who will tell you if you have new mail. This is not something that you must wonder about, or check fruitlessly - a woman just tells you. With her mouth. And then you know.

It is Friday and that means we have a new episode of Penny Arcade TV. This is one of our "4th panel" episodes in which we show you the trials and tribulations of the writing process. Enjoy!

That iPad presentation had to be the worst thing I've even seen on on the Apple stage. There is a part where they - I am not making a joke - there is a part where they try to make creating spreadsheets seem awesome. Jilted may be the word. Of course, we're at the second wave of commentary now, the reflexive defense phase, but I've seen this practiced arc too many times to feel its pull. Apple didn't make a case for the device.

The story about a prisoner deprived of his Dungeon Master's Guide and custom campaign world resonated. It sucks when the guards are all coming down on your shit, and, like, taking your stuff, but it also sucks pretty bad to be beaten to death with a sledgehammer, which is what this guy did to get in there. Tends to dilute the sympathy.