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I Think We're Alone Now

By Gabe – June 16, 2003

The new comic is up. With no Tycho around to torment I have been forced to turn my attention to my other friends. I called my buddy Robert a CockMonkey and then made an obscene gesture that involved a lot of thrusting on my part as well as some well choreographed hand motions. His feelings were hurt and I think he might have cried a little, but it just wasn't the same.

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It's Fun When Your Balls Swell

By Tycho – June 13, 2003

I keep hoping I'll see that fuckhole Rick Steves while I'm over here. Yes, that Rick Steves, PBS Rick Steves, Mr. Knows All About Europe, I'm Going To Punch Him In The Face Rick Steves.

NECROWOMBICON 2003!

By Gabe – June 11, 2003

The Necrowombicon is approaching and we here at the arcade are getting pretty damn excited. For those of you unfamiliar with the wombicon let me break it down for you. Imagine a two day Penny Arcade festival full of videogames, music and dorks just like you and I. Tycho and I along with a few members of the PA crew will be in attendance again this year. You can find all the details here along with instructions on how to register for the event. This will be our third Wombicon and I can tell you with all honestly it is shaping up to be the best ever.

Nokia to gamers: FUCK YOU!

By Gabe – June 11, 2003

As if the fact that the Nokia N-Gage is a pile of shit was not enough by itself to keep gamers everywhere from purchasing it, the head of Nokia’s entertainment division decided to insult his target audience. In an article over at Gamespot he had this to say regarding their competition.

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For John

By Gabe – June 11, 2003

On behalf of everyone here at PA, I would like to extend our best wishes to PA reader John who was diagnosed with cancer when he was 18. Now 19 his cancer has gone into remission and his friends tell me he is apparently doing quite well. This is just a note to let you know that about 2 million gamers are rooting for you John.

Venice, Italy

By Tycho – June 11, 2003

If Italy were a videogame, Venice would be the second level.

SNK vs. Capcom

By Gabe – June 9, 2003

Here is the best info I have seen yet on SNK vs. Capcom. These guys are down in Japan right now and videotaped their adventure to go play test the new fighter. Not sure how their site will handle the link but they sent me an email asking for it.

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Traffic As A Double Entendre

By Tycho – June 9, 2003

My grandfather once told me that he could make smoke come out of my ears, and I believed him. We were talking about a being who could produce money virtually on demand, and also appeared to have a limitless supply of bubblegum. I was willing to see this for myself, people made smoke rings and so forth, perhaps this procedure was related to that.

Hey Hey, We're The Monks

By Tycho – June 9, 2003

We saw something our last day in Rome that shut me right up. We went to something called the Cappuchine Crypt, where an order of monks made sculptures out of the bodies of brothers that had been returned to them. Each of five or six small rooms had their floors spread with earth from Jerusalem, and over this they combines different bones into patterns, flowers and other designs. An effigy of death itself held hourglass also made out of bones, for example - and a scythe made out of shoulder blades.

Well, Fuck

By Tycho – June 6, 2003

I typed in all those Goddamn newsposts and dated them for the future, I figured I was kosher up until Monday at least. We'll discuss things like Italian Traffic and CounterStrike next time, I'll make sure I track down another Cafe where I can do this kind of shit from.